Put an introvert in a meeting, and they’ll be the ones doing the most thinking and listening, not talking.
That’s means they can make a huge contribution because they’re deep, not loud. They usually take in what’s being discussed, then ponder after the meeting to shape their ideas. Their ideas are formed in a crock pot, not a microwave. Those ideas simmer until they’re rich and flavorful, and are often the most valuable insights of the entire meeting.
But nobody knows, since the meeting is over. Most people assume that since those participants didn’t say anything, they’re either disengaged or don’t have anything to contribute.
In other words, they’re invisible.
If those people don’t find ways to become visible, they’re often overlooked for promotions or key opportunities and assignments.
It’s tough enough in person. It’s exponentially tougher if the meeting is virtual.
If you’re an introvert working remotely, you’ve experienced the unique challenges. Besides the normal dynamics of finding your voice in meetings, there are the uncomfortable additions of being on a screen with others.
It often feels like there are certain people who lead the discussion, speaking over each other, while others languish in silence because they can’t figure out how to get a word in edgewise.
What’s the solution?
Virtual visibility doesn’t happen just because people can see you on the screen. It takes more intentionality than an in-person meeting, but it’s not difficult. It just requires a little stretching to “show up.”
By default, I’d always been the listener and observer on most virtual calls, operating where I was the most comfortable. This allowed me to process without talking, but it also kept me in the background.
I realized that people who talk in virtual meetings are seen as more competent and have more influence, so I knew I needed to contribute.
Here’s what helped me the most over time:
I changed my mindset. Usually when I thought of bringing something up, it felt like I was doing it to change how others perceived me. I wondered how they would respond if I said something in the meeting: What will they think of me? Is this worth bringing up? What if I mess up? It was all about me. So I worked on speaking up in order to contribute something of value, not just to be seen. That simple mindset change gave me a legitimate reason to say something that others would need and remember.
I went for quality of words, not quantity. I discovered that I didn’t need to be constantly contributing throughout the meeting to become visible. If I simply stayed mentally engaged in the conversation, I could always think of a clarifying question to ask or perspective to suggest. If I spoke once in each meeting, it put me on people’s radar.
I asked for the agenda. There might not be one in writing, but I would at least reach out to the leader to see if I could get an idea of what we’d be covering. That way I could think through the issues ahead of the meeting so I could focus on at least one area where I might be able to add value. (Preparation is an introvert’s best friend.)
I wrote comments in the chat section. Sometimes I might have something to say but felt awkward just speaking up in a large virtual group. I found that if I added a very concise thought in the chat, there would be a good chance the leader would pick up on it and ask me to comment verbally. I could then add a brief clarification that I was prepared for. (I also learned not to comment on other people’s comments, such as writing “Great idea” or “I agree.” Anything I wrote needed to add value to the discussion.)
I went first. I often had a good idea to share but was waiting for the right opportunity to mention it. Either that time never came, or someone else shared the same idea first. I learned that if I contributed early, it would establish me as an active participant—even if it was the only thing I shared. Often people would refer to my comment since it was one of the first things they heard in the meeting.
I would ask a question. It’s easier to ask a thought-provoking question than to come up with new ideas. “We’ve been talking about (item) . . . what if we thought about it from this perspective?” Questions carry an expectation of further discussion. Comments can simply be ignored.
I would mention the elephant in the room. I learned that if I was concerned about the direction the discussion was going, there were always others feeling the same way. When I carefully brought it up, it would open the door for the others to add their perspective.
I would turn my camera off occasionally, then back on. For one thing, it gave me a break from being “on” all the time. But also, every time I turned it back on, it would catch people’s attention that I had returned. A little thing, but it makes a difference for both you and others.
Want to be more visible? It really doesn’t take much to make a difference when you’re in a group, whether in-person or virtual. Don’t try to compete with extroverts; just craft a simple plan for each meeting where you get to make a dent in the simplest way possible!
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